Amy Himes-Kilgore, LMFT

Getting the courage to step into the therapy space can be the hardest part of this process

Starting therapy is intimidating for many clients, but getting help can create the change that is longed for. A couple who have been polite to each other for two years and can’t quite remember when that started. A parent who has run out of ideas for a teenager who won’t talk. Someone carrying a loss, or something that happened a long time ago, that they’ve never really been able to set down. If any of that sounds close, you’re in familiar company here.

With couples, it’s not always a crisis that brings people in. It’s distance. Two people who still care about each other and have slowly stopped being able to reach each other. We rebuild connections and restore friendships so that navigating the ups and downs of life becomes more possible.

I spent seven years as a high school counselor, and before that I worked with teenagers in wilderness programs in Southern Utah and as a family therapist for a high adventure program for adolescents. Teenagers can tell when they’re being managed, and I don’t do that. I talk to them like people, and I work with parents at the same time, because that relationship is usually where the change happens.

Grief and trauma are common struggles and sources of pain for many people. Sometimes it’s a recent loss. Sometimes it’s something old that talking alone has never quite reached. I’m trained in EMDR for that kind of work, and I also draw on CBT and solution-focused therapy. The method matters less than whether you feel heard, and ultimately you set the pace.

There’s one word that’s a driving force behind why I do this work: resilience. I believe every person has it in them to come through hard things and build a rewarding life. Mine is a busy one. My husband Jared and I have a blended family (three to eight children, depending on how you count) and most of our free time happens outside, at somebody’s game or on a trail somewhere.

I see clients in person in Saratoga Springs, and virtually for anyone in Utah or Virginia. You don’t need to have it figured out before you call. That’s what the first conversation is for.

What working together looks like

Our first session is mostly me getting to know you: what brought you in, what you’ve already tried, and what you’d like to feel different. There’s no pressure to tell me everything up front, and you don’t have to be in crisis to come in.

If you come as a couple, my job isn’t to decide who’s right. It’s to help you two hear one another and foster mutual understanding.

If you’re bringing a teenager, I’ll usually want time with them and time with you, and I’m clear with your teen from the start about what stays between us and what doesn’t.

And if you’re coming with grief, or something from a long time ago, nothing is expected of you in that first hour except showing up. We’ll start with what feels most urgent and the rest can wait until you’re ready.

Education and credentials

• MS in Marriage and Family Therapy, Seattle Pacific University, 2008
• BS in Psychology, Brigham Young University, 2000
• Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist (LMFT), State of Utah — license no. 6677343-3902
• Licensed to practice in Utah (in-person and virtual) and Virginia (virtual) — Virginia LMFT license no. 0717002765
• EMDR trained
• Methods used: CBT, Experiential Therapy, Motivational Interviewing, EMDR, Solution-Focused Therapy, Narrative Therapy and Rapid Resolution Therapy
• Experience: five years at Redwood Family Therapy; seven years as a high school counselor and an additional five years in community mental health in Wyoming; family therapist for a high adventure program for adolescents; guide for youth wilderness programs in Southern Utah

Focus areas and who I help

A focused set of areas I work in most.

What people say about Redwood

Questions people ask before reaching out

Do you take insurance?

Redwood doesn’t bill insurance directly. We’re an out-of-network provider, which keeps you free to choose the therapist who’s the right fit and keeps the cost clear and known up front. Many plans do reimburse part of out-of-network care, and Redwood partners with Mentaya so you can check whether yours does.

We’re not in crisis. Is it too soon for couples therapy?

No, and earlier is usually easier. Most of the couples I see aren’t in a crisis. They’re two people who still care about each other and have slowly stopped being able to talk. That’s a good time to come in.

My teenager doesn’t want to come. Is it still worth calling?

Yes. Almost no teenager arrives excited about therapy, and that’s normal. I spent seven years as a high school counselor, so a guarded teen isn’t new to me. I’ll also work with you as the parent, which often matters just as much as what happens in the room with your teen.

What happens in the first session?

Mostly getting to know you: what’s bringing you in, what you’ve already tried, and what you’d like to feel different. There’s no pressure to share more than you’re ready to, and you don’t have to be in crisis to come in.

Do you offer virtual sessions and evening appointments?

Yes to both. I see clients in person in Saratoga Springs and virtually for anyone located in Utah or Virginia, and Redwood is open until 9:00 PM Monday through Friday, so we can usually find a time that works around work and school.